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No Risk, No Fun?

I recently attended the German Association for Positive Psychology Research’s (Deutsche Gesellschaft für Positiv-Psychologische Forschung: http://dgppf.de) Conference at Trier University. It was a fantastic event with much food for thought. Over the next few days I will try to share some of the insights from the latest German PP research. So let’s start at the beginning…

The introductory keynote speech delivered by Professor Dr. Michaela Brohm-Badry of Trier University addressed the topic of “Risk, Happiness and Excitement”.

Professor Brohm-Badry explained how our ability to motivate ourselves is linked to our perception of the “excitement” of a task. Research exploring which games or sports events we find exciting shows that the outcome of a game must be unpredictable for it to be experienced as engaging. The risk of potential failure is the ingredient that makes it interesting. If we can easily beat our opponent, we think the game is boring; if it is too difficult, we also disengage. This also seems to be true for our inner motivation to complete various tasks. In a way, we compete against ourselves – and if the challenge is too simple or too complex, we lose interest.

We can only experience personal growth by putting ourselves outside of our comfort zone (also known as the “zone of stagnation”, I loved the visual imagery), and allowing ourselves to experience situations in which we might fail. We should be brave in pushing our boundaries, whilst not choosing tasks that generate fear since these will most likely not lead to growth.

In fact, there is a “growth zone” somewhere in the middle between boredom and fear – in which we are open-minded and will be motivated to try our new things. And try new things we should: only if we are required to test out new ideas and behaviours or approach problems from a new angle will we acquire new skills that contribute to our personal growth. And even if we make mistakes, and fail, we will learn more than others who never try anything new.

And in any case, failure is simply a matter of perception. As Thomas A. Edison famously said – “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

 

A detailed explanation of these ideas can be found the following article by Prof. Brohm-Bradry in German magazine Wirtschaftswoche: http://www.wiwo.de/erfolg/coach/glueck/wie-mut-uns-stimuliert-mach-was-womit-du-scheitern-kannst/19741370-all.html

 

 

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3 questions to help you identify your talents!

Discussing the notion of strengths and talents recently, an acquaintance was adamant that she had no talents. “What would you do with people like me?” she asked. Great question! First of all, I don’t believe anyone has no talents at all. In fact, I was pretty sure that anyone who knew her would be able to call out at least one strength that they had observed in her recently. Even I could and I had only met her 2 hours previously.

But it did raise some interesting questions. Why is it that some people do not recognise their own strengths? How can you help those who are convinced of their own inconspicuousness identify their talents? Is it even important to know your talents?

Talents are your innate abilities that can be developed into strengths with practice and application. You may have a talent such as strategic thinking that you have not yet had the opportunity to fully utilise due to circumstances of work or life. By knowing that this is a talent however, you can begin to seek out situations in which you can make use of this particular talent, grow it, and learn how to use it to your full advantage. This is a process that takes time, but since you are using a skill you have a natural pre-disposition for, it will come naturally to you and will most likely even be fun!

While there are some great assessments out there that make sense to take if you want to get deeper into the subject matter, there are a few basic questions that can help you figure out where your talents lie…

  1. What were you doing the last time you were enjoying yourself and lost track of time? Chances are that you were exercising one of your talents. Losing yourself in the “flow” of a task is a strong sign that the task is meaningful to you and that it comes naturally to you.
  2. What do your friends appreciate about you? False modesty is inappropriate 🙂 I am sure your friends have called out traits that they admire in you – your creativity, your self confidence, your ability to chat to strangers about anything 30 seconds after meeting them, your listening skills, your organisational skills, your humour and so on. “I don’t know how you do it” or “I wish I could do that” is always a good hint.
  3. What comes easily to you? What do you find really easy to do that others seem to struggle with? When have you been surprised that another person struggled to do something that you find simple? Your “normal” talent is very likely another person’s development need!
  4. Last but not least (the bonus question!) – ask somebody who knows you! Ideally, somebody you trust who has seen you operate in a variety of situations – ask them what skill they most value in you. You might be surprised!

Once you have your list of talents, take a moment to reflect on them. Any surprises? How much do you really use these strengths in your daily life? And finally, how can you grow and apply these skills every day to help you become even more successful at what you do? I challenge you to try out one idea this week…!

Have a great day!

Sarah